First I rightfully still do not endorse any Christians adds, anyone, any person, any organization, any Church  now trying to make any money from  the gospel, or begging, asking for money or even  any of the adds here.  I also do not endorse any of  Bibles, books, tapes listed here for sale too. Jesus said as we have freely received so we are freely to give. Hirelings in their greed and visible lack of faith don't do that. I do believe we should have the faith for God to supply what anyone needs  freely to anyone who needs it. 

You will never find real peace, happiness, joy, rest till you lay down all, your body, soul, spirit  at the sacrifice altar to God.



Sexual temptations and even divorce do now confront many persons today and they really do need help even  in this area.

("Please see also  My marriage failed..   or  Is divorce an option?  or Soul mate ?    Neither Pepsi. Coke nor Sex will make you really happy now too) )

The real problem of temptation even when married is that it does not tend to go away, it comes back but God will help us to deal with it...

(2 Tim 1:7 KJV)  For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. 
(1 Cor 14:8 KJV)  For if the trumpet give an uncertain sound, who shall prepare himself to the battle? 9 So likewise ye, except ye utter by the tongue words easy to be understood, how shall it be known what is spoken? for ye shall speak into the air.
(Mat 12:34) ... for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh. 35   A good man out of the good treasure of the heart bringeth forth good things: and an evil man out of the evil treasure bringeth forth evil things. 36  But I say unto you, That every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment

(Eph 4:29)  Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.

(Col 4:6)  Let your speech be alway with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.

(Psa 19:14) Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer.
Let me be clear too I firstly rightfully do prefer to define any of  the problems but also to mention God's input, help directly on the subjects now as well.. especially if I want to input anyone and to see any real positive changes in their life next too
(Eph 1:15 KJV)  Wherefore I also, after I heard of your faith in the Lord Jesus, and love unto all the saints, 16  Cease not to give thanks for you, making mention of you in my prayers; 17  That the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give unto you the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of him: 18  The eyes of your understanding being enlightened; that ye may know what is the hope of his calling, and what the riches of the glory of his inheritance in the saints, 18  The eyes of your   understanding being enlightened; that ye may know what is the hope of his calling, and what the riches of the glory of his inheritance in the saints, 19  And what is the exceeding greatness of his power to us-ward who believe, according to the working of his mighty power, 20  Which he wrought in Christ, when he raised him from the dead, and set him at his own right hand in the heavenly places, 21  Far above all principality, and power, and might, and dominion, and every name that is named, not only in this world, but also in that which is to come: 22  And hath put all things under his feet, and gave him to be the head over all things to the church, 23  Which is his body, the fulness of him that filleth all in all. 2:1  And you hath he quickened, who were dead in trespasses and sins: 2  Wherein in time past ye walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience: 3  Among whom also we all had our conversation in times past in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind; and were by nature the children of wrath, even as others. 4  But God, who is rich in mercy, for his great love wherewith he loved us, 5  Even when we were dead in sins, hath quickened us together with Christ, (by grace ye are saved;) 6  And hath raised us up together, and made us sit together in heavenly places in Christ Jesus: 7  That in the ages to come he might show the exceeding riches of his grace in his kindness toward us through Christ Jesus. 8  For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: 9  Not of works, lest any man should boast. 10  For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them.
The real problem of temptation is it not only  affects persons all ages, young and old, and the temptations in general will always be with us as long as we are in the flesh, but  even the supposed most spiritual people are the most likely to face the most severe temptations again, for unless we personally do learn to deal with it effectively  it will be even next worse. So let us list, face with insights our most common simple or complex temptations even, and really now find out why they do bother us now so much, continually  too.
(1 Cor 10:13 KJV)  There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.
And now what is the way out? It is also not a wrong sign of weakness, a personal failure to continually ask God for help, wisdom, understanding in dealing even with a particular situation, temptation, it is a sign of our rightful spiritual maturity, the right approach. Temptations can cause more spiritual growth in us and in others when we do learn how to deal with them next too.
 If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.6  But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed. 7  For let not that man think that he shall receive any thing of the Lord. 8  A double minded man is unstable in all his ways. (James 1:5 KJV) 
 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me: (John 10:27 KJV) 
(Jer 8:9 KJV)  The wise men are ashamed, they are dismayed and taken: lo, they have rejected the word of the LORD; and what wisdom is in them?
(1 Cor 12:8 KJV)  For to one is given by the Spirit the word of wisdom; to another the word of knowledge by the same Spirit;
(Col 3:16 KJV)  Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord.
If you find yourself being tempted It firstly certainly implies that you are now also seeing some of the moral issues clearly, correctly. No matter  still the very same temptation you face it has come upon a million others persons long before we were born.  And still next almost every sin will be prefaced by these   words-"My situation is an exception." and this successful approach has been the psychology of Satan for six thousand years. Your situation is very  normal.. now try to face all of  it, all of  the circumstances that have lead to your major temptations now too.
James 1:2-4. "My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations; Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing."
Temptation still does provides opportunity for OUR OWN PERSONAL spiritual conquest and growth.  Apostle  Paul said that we are being drawn in two directions every time we are tempted. At the crossroads where the two ways meet at the same time we are tempted to anger, we are also being tempted to self-control. When we are tempted to be dishonest, we are also tempted to be  honest.
The battle area of most temptations still tends to be first in our own mind. Are we even too ambitious for our own good? See simply  first what Jesus offers, a home in Heaven, down here on earth my sins forgiven, and that is enough for me, not what Satan rather has to offer.
(2 Chr 34:27 KJV)  Because thine heart was tender, and thou didst humble thyself before God, when thou heardest his words against this place, and against the inhabitants thereof, and humbledst thyself before me, and didst rend thy clothes, and weep before me; I have even heard thee also, saith the LORD.
(Psa 34:17 KJV)  The righteous cry, and the LORD heareth, and delivereth them out of all their troubles.  18  The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit. 19  Many are the afflictions of the righteous: but the LORD delivereth him out of them all. 20  He keepeth all his bones: not one of them is broken. 21  Evil shall slay the wicked: and they that hate the righteous shall be desolate. 22  The LORD redeemeth the soul of his servants: and none of them that trust in him shall be desolate.
(Psa 35:1 KJV)  A Psalm of David. Plead my cause, O LORD, with them that strive with me: fight against them that fight against me. 2  Take hold of shield and buckler, and stand up for mine help. 3  Draw out also the spear, and stop the way against them that persecute me: say unto my soul, I am thy salvation. 4  Let them be confounded and put to shame that seek after my soul: let them be turned back and brought to confusion that devise my hurt. 5  Let them be as chaff before the wind: and let the angel of the LORD chase them. 6  Let their way be dark and slippery: and let the angel of the LORD persecute them. 7  For without cause have they hid for me their net in a pit, which without cause they have digged for my soul. 8  Let destruction come upon him at unawares; and let his net that he hath hid catch himself: into that very destruction let him fall. 9  And my soul shall be joyful in the LORD: it shall rejoice in his salvation. 10  All my bones shall say, LORD, who is like unto thee, which deliverest the poor from him that is too strong for him, yea, the poor and the needy from him that spoileth him? 11  False witnesses did rise up; they laid to my charge things that I knew not. 12  They rewarded me evil for good to the spoiling of my soul. 13  But as for me, when they were sick, my clothing was sackcloth: I humbled my soul with fasting; and my prayer returned into mine own bosom. 14  I behaved myself as though he had been my friend or brother: I bowed down heavily, as one that mourneth for his mother. 15  But in mine adversity they rejoiced, and gathered themselves together: yea, the abjects gathered themselves together against me, and I knew it not; they did tear me, and ceased not: 16  With hypocritical mockers in feasts, they gnashed upon me with their teeth. 17  Lord, how long wilt thou look on? rescue my soul from their destructions, my darling from the lions. 18  I will give thee thanks in the great congregation: I will praise thee among much people. 19  Let not them that are mine enemies wrongfully rejoice over me: neither let them wink with the eye that hate me without a cause. 20  For they speak not peace: but they devise deceitful matters against them that are quiet in the land. 21  Yea, they opened their mouth wide against me, and said, Aha, aha, our eye hath seen it. 22  This thou hast seen, O LORD: keep not silence: O LORD, be not far from me. 23  Stir up thyself, and awake to my judgment, even unto my cause, my God and my Lord. 24  Judge me, O LORD my God, according to thy righteousness; and let them not rejoice over me. 25  Let them not say in their hearts, Ah, so would we have it: let them not say, We have   swallowed him up. 26  Let them be ashamed and brought to confusion together that rejoice at mine hurt: let them be clothed with shame and dishonour that magnify themselves against me. 27  Let them shout for joy, and be glad, that favour my righteous cause: yea, let them say continually, Let the LORD be magnified, which hath pleasure in the prosperity of his servant. 28  And my tongue shall speak of thy righteousness and of thy praise all the day long.
Admit readily too that you need help and humbly too.
Don't rather say, pray that  (Isa 14:14 KJV)  I will ascend above the heights of the clouds; I will be like the most High.
for  (Isa 14:15 KJV)  Yet thou shalt be brought down to hell, to the sides of the pit.
"Jesus still has said, "For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders, thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lasciviousness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness." Mark 7:21, 22. Almost every category of evil is included in this long list of sins which come forth from the heart. Paul described lust as "fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind." Ephesians 2:3. The Greek text more accurately says "desires of the thoughts." So do you want to be tempted less, than do also watch what you see and think too.  James describes it this way. "But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death." James 1:14, 15."
One of our first best protection against temptation now is to set a personal guard in our own mind by personally, readily  testing  every one of  entering thoughts and rejecting all, any  thoughts that are not from God,  and even next now pointing them out as lies.. by comparing them to God's own words. Reality
 (2 Cor 10:5 KJV)  Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;
(Mat 16:23 KJV)  But he turned, and said unto Peter, Get thee behind me, Satan: thou art an offence unto me: for thou savourest not the things that be of God, but those that be of men.
(Prov 12:3 KJV)  A man shall not be established by wickedness: but the root of the righteous shall not be moved.
(Mat 4:4 KJV)  But he answered and said, It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God.
(Mat 4:7 KJV)  Jesus said unto him, It is written again, Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God.
(Mat 4:10 KJV)  Then saith Jesus unto him, Get thee hence, Satan: for it is written, Thou shalt worship the Lord thy God, and him only shalt thou serve.
(Mat 4:11 KJV)  Then the devil leaveth him, and, behold, angels came and ministered unto him.
Our Prayer and the prayers of others are another effective resources that deals with temptation. Prayers of  "Lead us not into temptation"   
 The Bible also says, "The Lord knoweth how to deliver the godly out of temptations." 2 Peter 2:9. Again, God promises, "Because thou hast kept the word of my patience, I also will keep thee from the hour of temptation." Revelation 3:10.

Watch out always for the flesh..   When we seek any gratification outside the will of God, our will  has turned into lust. The temptation to lust is present, but this itself is not sin. Giving in to it is sin.  Acquiring something that is not in God's will leads  us to steal it thus too,  for the right way is always possible for us still.
And God generally does not work miracles to deliver those who do not use their own God-given power, will  to avoid evil.
"And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast if from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell." Matthew 5:29, 30
If we  find ourselves in any physical situation which opens a door to temptation, the wise counsel is to "cut it off" , do ASAP get away from any activity this enticement liable to lead into sin.  Even an bad employment,  position, a bad marriage  should be abandoned rather than risk the spiritual loss of eternal life.  If it can't be totally controlled, don't take the chance! Pluck it out! 

 "PLuck it out" conveys the idea of our own personal  if necessary. Would Jesus ask us to deny ourselves some good thing just because a small amount of mind pollution might be involved? Yes. 
"If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me." Luke 9:23.
(Mat 10:35 KJV)  For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.36   And a man's foes shall be they of his own household. 37 He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. 38   And he that taketh not his cross, and followeth after me, is not worthy of me. 39  He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it.
(1 Cor 7:1 KJV)  Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. 2  Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. 3  Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. 4  The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. 5  Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency. 6  But I speak this by permission, and not of commandment. 7  For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that. 8  I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I. 9  But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn. 10  And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: 11  But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife. 12  But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away. 13  And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. 14  For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. 15  But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace. 16  For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife? 17  But as God hath distributed to every man, as the Lord hath called every one, so let him walk. And so ordain I in all churches. 18  Is any man called being circumcised? let him not become uncircumcised. Is any called in uncircumcision? let him not be circumcised. 19  Circumcision is nothing, and uncircumcision is nothing, but the keeping of the commandments of God. 20  Let every man abide in the same calling wherein he was called.
(Prov 15:16 KJV)  Better is little with the fear of the LORD than great treasure and trouble therewith. 17  Better is a dinner of herbs where love is, than a stalled ox and hatred therewith.18   Better is a little with righteousness than great revenues without right. 19  Better it is to be of an humble spirit with the lowly, than to divide the spoil with the proud.  (Prov 17:1 KJV)  Better is a dry morsel, and quietness therewith, than an house full of sacrifices with strife. (Eccl 4:6 KJV)  Better is an handful with quietness, than both the hands full with travail and vexation of spirit.
(Prov 19:1 KJV)  Better is the poor that walketh in his integrity, than he that is perverse in his lips, and is a fool.  (Prov 28:6 KJV)  Better is the poor that walketh in his uprightness, than he that is perverse in his ways, though he be rich.
Paying a personal price to weed out temptation, and  NOT TO sin is still wrongfully not very popular even today. But personally saying No more to desirable, fleshly things is still a basic essential requirement of a Christian's Lordship discipleship of all those things present temptations which are likely to lead us into more sin.
(1 Cor 6:19 KJV)  What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? 20  For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's.
(Gal 3:29 KJV)  And if ye be Christ's, then are ye Abraham's seed, and heirs according to the promise.
It is not enough to cast out now on our own the  evil  thoughts or evil persons too now but we all also next do need more understanding, wisdom,  and this wisdom, understanding comes from God and regularly dwelling in his Words
(Eccl 7:8 KJV)  Better is the end of a thing than the beginning thereof: and the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit.
(Prov 15:19 KJV)  The way of the slothful man is as an hedge of thorns: but the way of the righteous is made plain.
(Prov 15:21 KJV)  Folly is joy to him that is destitute of wisdom: but a man of understanding walketh uprightly.
(Prov 15:24 KJV)  The way of life is above to the wise, that he may depart from hell beneath.
(Prov 15:26 KJV)  The thoughts of the wicked are an abomination to the LORD: but the words of the pure are pleasant words.
(Prov 15:27 KJV)  He that is greedy of gain troubleth his own house; but he that hateth gifts shall live.
(Prov 15:18 KJV)  A wrathful man stirreth up strife: but he that is slow to anger appeaseth strife.
(Prov 15:28 KJV)  The heart of the righteous studieth to answer: but the mouth of the wicked poureth out evil things.
(Prov 15:29 KJV)  The LORD is far from the wicked: but he heareth the prayer of the righteous.
(Prov 15:33 KJV)  The fear of the LORD is the instruction of wisdom; and before honour is humility.
(Prov 16:3 KJV)  Commit thy works unto the LORD, and thy thoughts shall be established.
(Prov 16:4 KJV)  The LORD hath made all things for himself: yea, even the wicked for the day of evil.  5  Every one that is proud in heart is an abomination to the LORD: though hand join in hand, he shall not be unpunished.
(Prov 16:6 KJV)  By mercy and truth iniquity is purged: and by the fear of the LORD men depart from evil.
(Prov 16:17 KJV)  The highway of the upright is to depart from evil: he that keepeth his way preserveth his soul.
(Prov 16:18 KJV)  Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall.
(Prov 16:25 KJV)  There is a way that seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.
Even with a spiritual mind, the mind of Christ there are still places, things, even people  to be avoided too have our needed victory. There are also still the devotional requirements to be wholly in harmony with Christ. The avenues of the mind must be always guarded and properly fed if we would defeat sin in its inception.
(Mat 12:43 KJV)  When the unclean spirit is gone out of a man, he walketh through dry places, seeking rest, and findeth none. 44  Then he saith, I will return into my house from whence I came out; and when he is come, he findeth it empty, swept, and garnished. 45  Then goeth he, and taketh with himself seven other spirits more wicked than himself, and they enter in and dwell there: and the last state of that man is worse than the first. Even so shall it be also unto this wicked generation.
(Phil 4:8 KJV)  Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.9  Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you.
Positive thoughts and positive actions, both are OFTEN still required..
"Let him that thinketh he standeth take heed lest he fall." 1 Corinthians 10:12.
 Remember Lot's wife. (Luke 17:32 KJV) 
Have you noticed how some of the most unlikely individuals still do  fall prey to the most unlikely sins? Do we become careless on the point of our supposed strength? It appears so.  Elijah's great strength was courage. He withstood single-handedly all the entrenched forces of Baal on Mt. Carmel. With incredible boldness he challenged anyone who deviated from a path of full obedience to God. Yet, immediately after his successful contest with the prophets of Baal, he fled like a coward from the threats of Queen Jezebel. It was so out of character for the fearless Tishbite! Did he drop his guard in the area of his fabled strength? Abraham was distinguished by his total trust in God. He is called the father of the faithful. Yet he lied to the King of Egypt out of fear that his wife would be taken from him. These great Bible characters not demonstrate dramatically how Satan attacks the place in our lives where there is a lack of alertness? No one should think he is immune to Satan's attacks because of some demonstrable virtues.  Not even King David now too, he next fell..  It is also very interesting to note that no one really anticipates the result of yielding to temptation, since it usually approaches along the line of least resistance. Gehazi saw the flashing colors of the Syrian garments-not the leprous scars which would follow him to the grave.  Judas could not see past the glittering silver coins to his fearful remorse and suicide.

Many temptations will cease to trouble us as we make the good choice a habit or also if we wrongfully give into Io them and the temptation will wrongfully no longer bother us NOW as well, "Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good." Romans 12:21. 
(2 Tim 2:15 KJV)  Study to show thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.
(2 Tim 2:16 KJV)  But shun profane and vain babblings: for they will increase unto more ungodliness.
Dealing also with the area of secular, sexual temptations and a good marriage now too.
I have personally found that too many of the  available written material dealing with marital problems and the Bible tend to follow the author's personal agenda's and really are not written in basic understanding, love, compassion. As a result I have tried to be more inclusive to all of the issues even realted to marital temptations too.
(John 13:34 KJV)  A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. 35   By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.
(Rom 12:9 KJV)  Let love be without dissimulation. Abhor that which is evil; cleave to that which is good. 10  Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another;
(Rom 13:8 KJV)  Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth another hath fulfilled the law.
(1 Cor 13:1 KJV)  Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.
(Rom 13:9 KJV)  For this, Thou shalt not commit adultery, Thou shalt not kill, Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not bear false witness, Thou shalt not covet; and if there be any other commandment, it is briefly comprehended in this saying, namely, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.10  Love worketh no ill to his neighbour: therefore love is the fulfilling of the law.
(2 Pet 2:18 KJV)  For when they speak great swelling words of vanity, they allure through the lusts of the flesh, through much wantonness, those that were clean escaped from them who live in error. 19  While they promise them liberty, they themselves are the servants of corruption: for of whom a man is overcome, of the same is he brought in bondage. 20  For if after they have escaped the pollutions of the world through the knowledge of the Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, they are again entangled therein, and overcome, the latter end is worse with them than the beginning. 21  For it had been better for them not to have known the way of righteousness, than, after they have known it, to turn from the holy commandment delivered unto them. 22 But it is happened unto them according to the true proverb, The dog is turned to his own vomit again; and the sow that was washed to her wallowing in the mire.
(1 John 1:9 KJV)  If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (1 John 1:10 KJV) If we say that we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.
I was prayerfuly medidating, dealing with the reality of God's punishment, which includes divorce, divorce is not one of God's inital blessing for all who expereince it in reality tend to know firsthand too..
The reality of  marital problems..
To falsely deny that marriage problems should and that they do not happen is an unrealistic  approach to life.. one of the most saddest aspects of marriage is that a marriage license itself, or a marriage in a church does not include, guarantee personally any preparation, success of the of marriage. It was also still takes equal participation, work by both parties to insure the marriage next does not crumble too. It takes two to make a marriage work. One can overcome the marital problems or one can falsely use them as an excuse to break up the marriage as well.
(Prov 26:2 KJV)  As the bird by wandering, as the swallow by flying, so the curse causeless shall not come. (Jer 3:20 KJV)  Surely as a wife treacherously departeth from her husband, so have ye dealt treacherously with me, O house of Israel, saith the LORD. (Jer 8:5 KJV)  Why then is this people of Jerusalem slidden back by a perpetual backsliding? they hold fast deceit, they refuse to return. (Psa 119:9 KJV)   Wherewithal shall a young man cleanse his way? by taking heed thereto according to thy word. .(2 Cor 6:17 KJV)  Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you.  (Heb 10:38 KJV) " Now the just shall live by faith: but if any man draw back, my soul shall have no pleasure in him. "
The marital basics, issues..
Most anyone who has taken a University course in the validity of "contract law" should know that both parties have to always keep their agreements, neither parties can change any of the agreement on their own too, and they do have to do and keep their part, and if one party refuses to do so they now  have wrongfully broken the contract and can be rightfully penalized for doing so. If one spouse is too lazy or too immoral to keep their part, and/or has lied in making the contract the marriage contract will fail next, be invalid thus.   What I would like to do here is give a view that I have prayed much on and feel is the true intent of Gods word to us. Some of the issues mentioned here in compassion are not an excuse to separate or divorce but rather a real look at real life. I think God is more gracious and understanding then we sometimes like to give him credit for. I think that in our zeal to be obedient we sometimes misrepresent the mind of God. Marriage and what God intended is often decided based on the way that many leaders in the church interrupt the Bible to their own liking still and not always with peace being in mind. The union between man and woman is most important and is liked always to the union between man and God, and more so his church and Christ.
Be Aware.. Many people still do listen to the bad advice of others, one the devil's favorite approach still  is to send a person, a neighbor, friend, stranger, relative, to us pretending to be a friend, helper, feeding us lies trying to cause us to sin, to do wrong... and we do too often listen to them wrongfully too. Wounded marriages facing divorce can be made whole but very unlikely if you do go to most counselors today, even in the church who wrongfully take the false, the supposedly more easy approach and simply, wrongfully  recommend divorce.
Face it.  Man is composed body, soul and sprit, and having a spouse, a person who only meets one's body needs is clearly not  enough, nor in fact is it enough next to have friendship only at the soulish level as well. Man has a spiritual vacuum that he seeks to be filled as well. Marriage is one way some people try to fill in the void they feel. Earthly Marriage it itself is never an adequate solution for all of your needs firstly  as well. We all need to daily be mindful of this truth now too. .The truths mentioned here are important for us all, always too
Firslty now too all men and women need to be firstly careful and deliberate in choosing someone beforehand for a lifetime partner,  for real Incompatibility problems do next become very quickly manifested after the honeymoon is over.   The Marriages made by fraud, deceit, lies, misrepresentations will next fail as a result too and not even the  sex can  hold this marriage  together. The sharing and mutual enjoyment of sex now also is the resulting reward of a good a marriage but that alone, sex  will not keep a couple together. Sex is not Love itself firstly too.  Children, religion, hobbies, friends, good works  and many other common needs, interests all add to a happy marriage.
Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them. 21 Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven.(Mat 7:20 KJV)   But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves..(James 1:22 KJV)
(Ezek 33:31 KJV)  And they come unto thee as the people cometh, and they sit before thee as my people, and they hear thy words, but they will not do them: for with their mouth they show much love, but their heart goeth after their covetousness.
(Mat 15:8 KJV)  This people draweth nigh unto me with their mouth, and honoureth me with their lips; but their heart is far from me. 9  But in vain they do worship me, teaching for doctrines the commandments of men.
(Jer 8:5 KJV)  Why then is this people of Jerusalem slidden back by a perpetual backsliding? they hold fast deceit, they refuse to return.
(Jer 9:6 KJV)  Thine habitation is in the midst of deceit; through deceit they refuse to know me, saith the LORD.
(Jer 9:8 KJV)  Their tongue is as an arrow shot out; it speaketh deceit: one speaketh peaceably to his neighbour with his mouth, but in heart he layeth his wait.
(Mark 7:6 KJV)  He answered and said unto them, Well hath Esaias prophesied of you hypocrites, as it is written, This people honoureth me with their lips, but their heart is far from me. 7  Howbeit in vain do they worship me, teaching for doctrines the commandments of men. 8   For laying aside the commandment of God, ye hold the tradition of men, as the washing of pots and cups: and many other such like things ye do.
(Mat 10:17 KJV)  But beware of men: for they will deliver you up to the councils, and they will scourge you in their synagogues;
Too many people too readily accept even the professing Christians persons now as being real Christians when in reality they are not.  
Many persons still do fail to realize beforehand that the person that now they are even selecting on their own possibly for their mate may have unresolved personal issues, sins that will next have serious an adverse effect not only on their marriage, relationship but even on others as well.
We need God's wisdom to know what some people are now really like still too. It is not enough to accept the word of even a professing Christian, as to them even now being real, born again Christians too, 
(Luke 17:32 KJV)  Remember Lot's wife. 33   Whosoever shall seek to save his life shall lose it; and whosoever shall lose his life shall preserve it.
(Psa 32:10 KJV)  Many sorrows shall be to the wicked: but he that trusteth in the LORD, mercy shall compass him about.
(2 Pet 2:4 KJV)  For if God spared not the angels that sinned, but cast them down to hell, and delivered them into chains of darkness, to be reserved unto judgment;5  And spared not the old world, but saved Noah the eighth person, a preacher of righteousness, bringing in the flood upon the world of the ungodly; 6  And turning the cities of Sodom and Gomorrha into ashes condemned them with an overthrow, making them an ensample unto those that after should live ungodly; 7  And delivered just Lot, vexed with the filthy conversation of the wicked: 8  (For that righteous man dwelling among them, in seeing and hearing, vexed his righteous soul from day to day with their unlawful deeds;) 9  The Lord knoweth how to deliver the godly out of temptations, and to reserve the unjust unto the day of judgment to be punished:
Major, major concern.. Still if anyone was to browse the prayer requests  posted on the Internet one can quickly see that prayers for a mate take a large part of the center stage as well as THEIR concern of having a good, well paid  job, and one's health. Anyone involved in counseling knows that marriage complaints take the center stage there as well. Why? Many  People have used the wrong advice, approach in finding a mate still too.
One way we personally do manifest God's glory is how we do firstly seek a Christian mate, a mate that God has chosen for us, and next by also how we do treat them
(Gal 6:14 KJV)  But God forbid that I should glory, save in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, by whom the world is crucified unto me, and I unto the world.

 ďlet your light shine . . . in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heavenĒ(Mt. 5:16).
(1 Cor 10:31 KJV)  Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God.

(1 Cor 10:32 KJV)  Give none offence, neither to the Jews, nor to the Gentiles, nor to the church of God:

(1 Cor 10:33 KJV)  Even as I please all men in all things, not seeking mine own profit, but the profit of many, that they may be saved.   "Glory to God in the highest heaven"(Lk. 2:14)

(1 Cor 11:1 KJV)  Be ye followers of me, even as I also am of Christ.

for ďIt is He who has made us, and not we ourselvesĒ(Ps. 100:3). It is God alone who ďgives to all life and breath and all thingsĒ(Acts 17:25). ďEveryone who is called by My name, whom I have created for My gloryĒ(Isa. 43:7).

(Isa 42:8 KJV)  I am the LORD: that is my name: and my glory will I not give to another, neither my praise to graven images.  "You shall have no other gods before Me"(Ex. 20:3).

(John 17:1 KJV)  These words spake Jesus, and lifted up his eyes to heaven, and said, Father, the hour is come; glorify thy Son, that thy Son also may glorify thee: 2  As thou hast given him power over all flesh, that he should give eternal life to as many as thou hast given him. 3  And this is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent. 4  I have glorified thee on the earth: I have finished the work which thou gavest me to do. 5  And now, O Father, glorify thou me with thine own self with the glory which I had with thee before the world was. 6  I have manifested thy name unto the men which thou gavest me out of the world: thine they were, and thou gavest them me; and they have kept thy word. 7  Now they have known that all things whatsoever thou hast given me are of thee. 8  For I have given unto them the words which thou gavest me; and they have received them, and have known surely that I came out from thee, and they have believed that thou didst send me. 9  I pray for them: I pray not for the world, but for them which thou hast given me; for they are thine. 10  And all mine are thine, and thine are mine; and I am glorified in them. 11  And now I am no more in the world, but these are in the world, and I come to thee. Holy Father, keep through thine own name those whom thou hast given me, that they may be one, as we are. 12  While I was with them in the world, I kept them in thy name: those that thou gavest me I have kept, and none of them is lost, but the son of perdition; that the scripture might be fulfilled. 13  And now come I to thee; and these things I speak in the world, that they might have my joy fulfilled in themselves. 14  I have given them thy word; and the world hath hated them, because they are not of the world, even as I am not of the world. 15  I pray not that thou shouldest take them out of the world, but that thou shouldest keep them from the evil. 16  They are not of the world, even as I am not of the world. 17  Sanctify them through thy truth: thy word is truth. 18  As thou hast sent me into the world, even so have I also sent them into the world. 19  And for their sakes I sanctify myself, that they also might be sanctified through the truth. 20  Neither pray I for these alone, but for them also which shall believe on me through their word; 21  That they all may be one; as thou, Father, art in me, and I in thee, that they also may be one in us: that the world may believe that thou hast sent me. 22  And the glory which thou gavest me I have given them; that they may be one, even as we are one: 23  I in them, and thou in me, that they may be made perfect in one; and that the world may know that thou hast sent me, and hast loved them, as thou hast loved me. 24  Father, I will that they also, whom thou hast given me, be with me where I am; that they may behold my glory, which thou hast given me: for thou lovedst me before the foundation of the world. 25  O righteous Father, the world hath not known thee: but I have known thee, and these have known that thou hast sent me. 26  And I have declared unto them thy name, and will declare it: that the love wherewith thou hast loved me may be in them, and I in them.
(2 Cor 11:3 KJV)  But I fear, lest by any means, as the serpent beguiled Eve through his subtlety, so your minds should be corrupted from the simplicity that is in Christ.
(2 Cor 11:4 KJV)  For if he that cometh preacheth another Jesus, whom we have not preached, or if ye receive another spirit, which ye have not received, or another gospel, which ye have not accepted, ye might well bear with him.
  (Gen 2:18 KJV)  And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
(Eccl 4:9 KJV)  Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour.10  For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up.11  Again, if two lie together, then they have heat: but how can one be warm alone? 12  And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken.

One cannot but help but notice today that the world says everything is right to do , including sexual impurities.. of gays, lesbians, adultery, fornication, sex outside of marriage. pornography/

(Heb 13:4 KJV)  Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.
Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful. 2  But his delight is in the law of the LORD; and in his law doth he meditate day and night. 3  And he shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that bringeth forth his fruit in his season; his leaf also shall not wither; and whatsoever he doeth shall prosper. 4  The ungodly are not so: but are like the chaff which the wind driveth away. 5  Therefore the ungodly shall not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous. 6  For the LORD knoweth the way of the righteous: but the way of the ungodly shall perish.  (Psalm1:1 KJV)
The world and it's followers as usual wrongfully  moves towards  a sexual permissiveness society not classified as infidelity or unfaithfulness and one rather too often without guilt or conscience, thus sex among single people is no longer considered wrong by much of today's generation.
Likewise many married couples take the same attitude toward extra-marital affairs and as usual Christians will still be wrongfully led to follow them.. rather than the world to follow the Christians? why? what else is new? the problem existed in both the Old and New Testament times too.. and the answer for it is in the same Bible too.
(1 Tim 5:20 KJV)  Them that sin rebuke before all, that others also may fear.
We on earth are always tempted to walk in a sinful manner, daily by Satan and others, and yet God says for us to walk pure, holy, even one towards another and sexually as well.... Both old testament and new testament references included the sexual behavior. God commands holy living and aids us to be holy as well.
(1 Cor 7:39 KJV)  The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth; but if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord.
(Lev 20:7 KJV)  Sanctify yourselves therefore, and be ye holy: for I am the LORD your God. 8  And ye shall keep my statutes, and do them: I am the LORD which sanctify you. 9  For every one that curseth his father or his mother shall be surely put to death: he hath cursed his father or his mother; his blood shall be upon him. 10  And the man that committeth adultery with another man's wife, even he that committeth adultery with his neighbour's wife, the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death. 11  And the man that lieth with his father's wife hath uncovered his father's nakedness: both of them shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them. 12  And if a man lie with his daughter in law, both of them shall surely be put to death: they have wrought confusion; their blood shall be upon them. 13  If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them. 14  And if a man take a wife and her mother, it is wickedness: they shall be burnt with fire, both he and they; that there be no wickedness among you. 15  And if a man lie with a beast, he shall surely be put to death: and ye shall slay the beast. 16  And if a woman approach unto any beast, and lie down thereto, thou shalt kill the woman, and the beast: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them. 17  And if a man shall take his sister, his father's daughter, or his mother's daughter, and see her nakedness, and she see his nakedness; it is a wicked thing; and they shall be cut off in the sight of their people: he hath uncovered his sister's nakedness; he shall bear his iniquity. 18  And if a man shall lie with a woman having her sickness, and shall uncover her nakedness; he hath discovered her fountain, and she hath uncovered the fountain of her blood: and both of them shall be cut off from among their people. 19  And thou shalt not uncover the nakedness of thy mother's sister, nor of thy father's sister: for he uncovereth his near kin: they shall bear their iniquity. 20  And if a man shall lie with his uncle's wife, he hath uncovered his uncle's nakedness: they shall bear their sin; they shall die childless. 21  And if a man shall take his brother's wife, it is an unclean thing: he hath uncovered his brother's nakedness; they shall be childless. 22  Ye shall therefore keep all my statutes, and all my judgments, and do them: that the land, whither I bring you to dwell therein, spue you not out. 23  And ye shall not walk in the manners of the nation, which I cast out before you: for they committed all these things, and therefore I abhorred them.

(1 Pet 1:15 KJV)  But as he which hath called you is holy, so be ye holy in all manner of conversation;
(1 Pet 1:16 KJV)  Because it is written, Be ye holy; for I am holy.
Do not be too quick to judge others, your spouse firstly too. Let God judge them. Or you will be really humbled personally next yourself by temptations even.. God alone sees the truth is still a real  judge of human affairs. People who fall into sin are generally not doing anything good in the first place. If you find yourselves with the more temptations being faced often ask yourself what are you not doing that rather should be done instead now too. Being unrepentant, lazy, sleeping too much will also cause you to fall into more sin too.  
There also is no provision for divorce of any Christians couples for  God hates divorce and he defines divorce as a sin of adultery too.
(Mal 2:16 KJV)  For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away: for one covereth violence with his garment, saith the LORD of hosts: therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously.
 Ephesians 5:22-33óWives be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her; that He might sanctify her having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she should be holy and blameless. So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes it and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, because we are members of his own body. for this cause a man shall leave his father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and his church. Nevertheless let each individual among you also love his own wife even as himself; and let the wife see to it that she respect her husband.
(Gal 6:7 KJV)  Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.
(Gal 6:8 KJV)  For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting.
(Gal 6:9 KJV)  And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.
(Gal 6:10 KJV)  As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men, especially unto them who are of the household of faith.

"  Sunday, Dec 12, 2004    Husband charged in Ont. school murder remanded to custody  BRAMPTON, Ont. (CP) -   62-year-old  Erhun Candir  Saturday   chargedcharged with first-degree murder  in the shooting death of his wife of nearly two decades at a local high school.  Candir, charged with first-degree murder, was remanded in custody until Monday.  Aysegul Candir, who had taught English as a second language at Bramalea Secondary School for two years, was shot in the head in the school parking lot Friday and died in hospital hours later.    The shooting prompted a school-wide lockdown and sent students diving under their desks for cover where they remained for several hours before being allowed out.  The 47-year-old woman was a teacher in her native Turkey from 1980 to 1986 before immigrating to Canada. She taught at numerous schools throughout the Toronto area before beginning at Bramalea.   The brazen school-hour attack shook the community and has left investigators and experts asking why a marriage that had lasted that long would end so violently.  Those who have studied violence against women say such incidents between seemingly comfortable couples are not entirely uncommon, but they demonstrate a lack of mechanisms in place to detect domestic abuse.  "Clearly there aren't (enough mechanisms), or this kind of thing wouldn't happen," said Cathleen Fillmore, an expert on violence. "   and who really cares???? not the governments? lawyers, courts, pastors??? for they still do tend to encourage the marriage break up wrongfully instead..

What really is needed is mandatory divorce counseling before couples go ahead with divorce, but the  way thinks are it is very likely the counselor, pastors, lawyer ends up sleeping with one of the spouse and would wrongfully recommend divorce anyway.. and third parties who do that should be fired, prosecuted  now too.  When one of the spouses clearly firsthand too knows they are now even being abused by the lies, the dishonesty, unethical behavior of the other spouse in a divorce, separation  proceeding, then personally revenge, taking back justice, through action with one's own hands is a too common normal reaction.
Thousands of years ago Jesus said men and women are equal sinners too. Divorce, even murder often is caused by one's personal inability to cope with   life.  It is my own basic  view that each case of divorce today can be reduced likely to one of five categories:  too altruistic behavior, acutely psychotic behavior, covetousness behaviors, no longer a wanted partner, and also revenge against a partner.  "Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good." Romans 12:21.  
While  it is still  not too uncommon for both men and women to be tempted with sexual desire for someone other than their mate it is a severe sin that God readily punish us for here on earth as Kind David and Israel found out firsthand too, even if your pastor lies to you and may say this is not so too.
(1 Cor 5:9 KJV)  I wrote unto you in an epistle not to company with fornicators:10  Yet not altogether with the fornicators of this world, or with the covetous, or extortioners, or with idolaters; for then must ye needs go out of the world. 11  But now I have written unto you not to keep company, if any man that is called a brother be a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolater, or a railer, or a drunkard, or an extortioner; with such an one no not to eat. 12  For what have I to do to judge them also that are without? do not ye judge them that are within? 13  But them that are without God judgeth. Therefore put away from among yourselves that wicked person. 6:1  Dare any of you, having a matter against another, go to law before the unjust, and not before the saints? 2  Do ye not know that the saints shall judge the world? and if the world shall be judged by you, are ye unworthy to judge the smallest matters? 3  Know ye not that we shall judge angels? how much more things that pertain to this life? 4  If then ye have judgments of things pertaining to this life, set them to judge who are least esteemed in the church. 5  I speak to your shame. Is it so, that there is not a wise man among you? no, not one that shall be able to judge between his brethren?
Here is another reality, one has to try to reconcile a divided marriage not rather work wrongfully to break it up, as its too often the case, and in reality in  almost all cases where there is a marriage break up and they are not quickly shortly reunited  as a result a long term separation, or a divorce permanently tends to occur, and note this one of the parties next tends to becomes unfaithful, does commits sexual immorality too as a result even due to one's false lusts, where a persons 's own  false ego may also be involved in thinking they are desirable to others. Sex with someone else is still tooo often today falsely presented as a thrilling prospect of suppsoed personal sexual gratification  or an extra-marital affair as an adventuresome escapade  but the reality it is far from this false concepts.. there is next as a result still despair, guilt next, even bitterness, hatred, and a lot more negatives in reality too.
(Prov 5:3 KJV)  For the lips of a strange woman drop as an honeycomb, and her mouth is smoother than oil:4   But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword. 5 Her feet go down to death; her steps take hold on hell.
(2 Sam 13:10 KJV)  And Amnon said unto Tamar, Bring the meat into the chamber, that I may eat of thine hand. And Ta mar took the cakes which she had made, and brought them into the chamber to Amnon her brother. 11  And when she had brought them unto him to eat, he took hold of her, and said unto her, Come lie with me, my sister. 12  And she answered him, Nay, my brother, do not force me; for no such thing ought to be done in Israel: do not thou this folly. 13  And I, whither shall I cause my shame to go? and as for thee, thou shalt be as one of the fools in Israel. Now therefore, I pray thee, speak unto the king; for he will not withhold me from thee. 14  Howbeit he would not hearken unto her voice: but, being stronger than she, forced her, and lay with her. 15  Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her. And Amnon said unto her, Arise, be gone. 16  And she said unto him, There is no cause: this evil in sending me away is greater than the other that thou didst unto me. But he would not hearken unto her. 17  Then he called his servant that ministered unto him, and said, Put now this woman out from me, and bolt the door after her.
"Well let me also now say, nothing Iím going to say here is intended to take away any of the responsibility towards your past, existing marriage, of still even trying to make it work, or not  to make light of wedding vows. Nor I am not going to try and hold you blameless for mistake either, or my self. For we all sin and fail, we are sinners and we are not perfect and we need to see we do fail due to even our own sins, admit them, ask for God's forgiveness, help to go on. To go on where God leads us not where we want to go still. "
(Psa 37:23 KJV)  The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD: and he delighteth in his way.
"I think I understand many of the battles that  you also do fight because I too have been there now firstly.   And I am not going to go through all my own problems are why the marriage didnít make it. I equally take the blame on myself, if I would have done many things different maybe we would have made it. After all 26 years is a long time to be with someone, and to have three wonderful kids, to have spent all my life and my wifeís life in church, what went wrong? The bottom line is both of us failed, we took our eyes off God and focused on ourselves, no we didnít know we were, we didnít plan on it, yet we did. The last symptom  about my own failures was that once the bond of trust is broke you are on an up hill battle from there on. What breaks that bond of trust is not just a husband or wife cheating or flirting with the opposite sex, it is not just  how they  handled the money, the lies you told each other. The unacceptable lack of real love, inability wrongfully to forgive by one spouse has caused, lead to the divorce procedure.. Theses sins lead to more disasters.
And the negative Symptoms can be   a big sense of the other person not loving enough or lack of showing love. Still the reasons for the break up are many, on both of the spouses part,  and they can be eventually understood, and this here is not  intent of what God is placed on my heart it  is not to try and tell you now how maybe you can o fix the damage in a failed marriage in a few minutes, which is unlikely in every troubled marriages still too, but to address mainly those people that the marriage clearly has ready failed and are they now headed for the divorce courts. To talk to those that could people still maybe restore the home front but not guaranteed to do so still. Since both parties likely relay need to change too often and one can wrongfully still refuse to do so. The other one may have to go on. Go on to what you may say? God on with and to God firstly.
If your marriage still has any hope and you are headed for destroying that wrongfully there will be more pain too,  but what if it is relay too late now , too wrong  to do so? Impossible you may  say? Maybe not I say!"
One of the sad aspect of a marriage break up is one partner tends to claim to be totally innocent next even falsely blaming the other party in full, generally for the most part still not the reality, far from the truth.  Both men and women do now personally contribute to marital break up now as well. In reality some men do  become so engrossed in their job or business, while some women become so engrossed in their own goals. even relatives, parents  until they have little time for their own spouse and family. They do become obsessed with it all  and it doesn't take a spouse rightfully who feels neglected and unloved under these conditions to next  want to leave the marriage. Some of he real problems in most failed marriages still is simply the laziness, ignorance, false expectations,  and impatience.
Sex still is not the main goal, purpose  of any marriage now as well. A marital realtionship is. The Lack of supposed valid sexual satisfaction, real or imagined,  due to the too often glorified overemphasis of sex on every hand is still a very  false reason to commit sin.. our resulting lack of intimacy with our spouse may merely reflect the reality that we have lost our first love our intimacy with Jesus himself firstly.. (Rev 2:4 KJV)  Nevertheless I have somewhat against thee, because thou hast left thy first love. 5   Remember therefore from whence thou art fallen, and repent, and do the first works; or else I will come unto thee quickly, and will remove thy candlestick out of his place, except thou repent.
"One newly wed wife said she expected bells to ring, sirens to wail and psychedelic lights to flash on and off. When this didn't happen she thought she had been cheated. This negative thinking soon resulted in her thinking the trouble was with her husband. He wasn't the romantic lover she thought he would be. Consequently she turned to another man for love and sexual satisfaction. However it didn't take her long to discover this really wasn't the answer to her problem." Some persons are disappointed with their  marriage in general. They may be still immature or still simply unable to accept the responsibility, the hard work  that goes with marriage. Getting married does not mean you have an easy life now  and that you will  even prosper as a result too, , all will go well for you in life.. that is a really unrealistic, false expectation of what a marriage is.. To many people official  marriage is a form of bondage or a yoke they do not want to wear. In their frustration they think that maybe another woman or another man is the true answer to their problem. It is very easy to imagine that the grass is greener in another pasture and wrongfully not commit oneself to the marriage.
In fact earthly Romanticism is generally a false lustful spirit designed to take our life, goals, thoughts  away from God, Jesus Christ. The real problem in most marriages still is simply the laziness, ignorance, false expectations,  and impatience. The Sexual fulfillment  does not always come quickly nor easily, and is a reward of the hard work putt into the marriage.
But there are also still cases in which one marriage partner, even in pastor's home too now,  is actually guilty of withholding themselves from sexual union with their mate even because they wrongfully have someone else in mind. It could be the man or the woman. A prolonged situation such as this can lead to the deprived mate also turning to another for sexual gratification.  God's word says, "Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto her husband. The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. Defraud ye not one another, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency." I Cor. 7:3-5.
(Luke 8:13 KJV)  They on the rock are they, which, when they hear, receive the word with joy; and these have no root, which for a while believe, and in time of temptation fall away.
(1 Th 4:1 KJV)  Furthermore then we beseech you, brethren, and exhort you by the Lord Jesus, that as ye have received of us how ye ought to walk and to please God, so ye would abound more and more. 2  For ye know what commandments we gave you by the Lord Jesus. 3  For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication: 4  That every one of you should know how to possess his vessel in sanctification and honour; 5  Not in the lust of concupiscence, even as the Gentiles which know not God: 6  That no man go beyond and defraud his brother in any matter: because that the Lord is the avenger of all such, as we also have forewarned you and testified. 7  For God hath not called us unto uncleanness, but unto holiness. 8  He therefore that despiseth, despiseth not man, but God, who hath also given unto us his holy Spirit.  9  But as touching brotherly love ye need not that I write unto you: for ye yourselves are taught of God to love one another. 10  And indeed ye do it toward all the brethren which are in all Macedonia: but we beseech you, brethren, that ye increase more and more; 11  And that ye study to be quiet, and to do your own business, and to work with your own hands, as we commanded you; 12  That ye may walk honestly toward them that are without, and that ye may have lack of nothing.
It is also said that one of  the greatest cause of marital trouble among many married couples next leading to separation and divorce is supposedly the money problems or the lack of finances in reality the rather unrestrained personal lusts, even idolatry,  and this next often also leads further to one of the spouse's infidelity or unfaithfulness. Actually most of the financial problems  firstly are caused not only firstly by uncontrolled  personal lust, ignorance, inexperience, spiritual and physical immaturity still. Many persons  do not know what it means to be frugal, simply  and to live within their means or they now wrongfully refuse to do so. This lusts and resulting  frustration lead to arguments and fights with each one  blaming the other for their trouble.  TV and radio, billboard Commercial that promote prosperity clearly  add to the problems. 
(1 Tim 6:10 KJV)  For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.
(1 Tim 6:11 KJV)  But thou, O man of God, flee these things; and follow after righteousness, godliness, faith, love, patience, meekness
(1 Tim 6:8 KJV)  And having food and raiment let us be therewith content.
(1 Tim 6:9 KJV)  But they that will be rich fall into temptation and a snare, and into many foolish and hurtful lusts, which drown men in destruction and perdition.
(Heb 13:5 KJV)  Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee. 6  So that we may boldly say, The Lord is my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me.
(1 Tim 6:17 KJV)  Charge them that are rich in this world, that they be not highminded, nor trust in uncertain riches, but in the living God, who giveth us richly all things to enjoy;18 That they do good, that they be rich in good works, ready to distribute, willing to communicate;19  Laying up in store for themselves a good foundation against the time to come, that they may lay hold on eternal life. 20 O Timothy, keep that which is committed to thy trust, avoiding profane and vain babblings, and oppositions of science falsely so called: 21   Which some professing have erred concerning the faith. Grace be with thee. Amen.
From a distance also the grass always seems to look greener in another pasture. And you are not as subject to notice the thistles, cockleburs and weeds in the other pasture as you are in your own.
(James 4:1 KJV)  From whence come wars and fightings among you? come they not hence, even of your lusts that war in your members?
(Mat 19:6 KJV)  Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
(Acts 10:15 KJV)  And the voice spake unto him again the second time, What God hath cleansed, that call not thou common.
 Interfering, meddling  friends, neighbors, relatives and/or Sexual infidelity can seriously help to cause a marital division. The  lack of marital togetherness or marital unity can expedite a marriage to break up next. . (Luke 11:17 KJV)  But he, knowing their thoughts, said unto them, Every kingdom divided against itself is brought to desolation; and a house divided against a house falleth.
It is also true that when a man or woman is left out of the other spouse's  life in these things they are subject to turn to for the worse... God has made man to share with others. When he is denied this privilege he tends to be very  lonely and unhappy. A vacuum is created that must be filled. In this condition a man or woman will give their affection and love to the one that fills the vacuum. Psalms 133:1 says, "Behold how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity!" applies to a marriage now too.. a church.. a home.
If you do still  steal, commit wicked deeds your spouse will likely despise you next for it and sex will not solve the marriage too 
II Cor. 7:1 says, "Having therefore these promises, dearly beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from all filthiness of the flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God."
 Prov. 31:10-11 says, "Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil."  Apostle Peter tells the wives that outward adornment such as hair, jewelry and clothing is not as important in winning their husbands as the inward adornment of a meek and a quiet spirit. I Peter 3:1-4.
(Prov 12:4 KJV)  A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones.
(Prov 14:30 KJV)  A sound heart is the life of the flesh: but envy the rottenness of the bones.
(Isa 5:24 KJV)  Therefore as the fire devoureth the stubble, and the flame consumeth the chaff, so their root shall be as rottenness, and their blossom shall go up as dust: because they have cast away the law of the LORD of hosts, and despised the word of the Holy One of Israel.
Some people still do even when married the do still now even have an Avenue of an unclean,  evil spirits. When a person begins to play the field in sexual permissiveness even before or after a marriage they are subject to receive a sex demon. It is believed that one of the seven devils that went out of Mary Magdalene was such a spirit. Luke 8:2. These people are often incapable next of removing that evil spirit as well.
I saw firsthand in a Hospital an ostrich type  mother indifferent to her very critically ill child because she wanted rather  to be on a date with her boyfriend.. men are like that too now.. I have seen such behavior since still too often by men and women. Someone how too many people likely because of commercials have been  wrongfully led to believe life should be easy and it is sex that will make you happy.... life is really hard for many persons in reality.. many.. we all seem to have a hard cross to bear... and even sex is not the answer. Jesus alone is.
"King Arthur had a wife who next wanted a n adulterous boyfriend  Lancelot to seduce her".. this kind of demonic fantasy is the unacceptable reality of many ungodly women even today. Too often today  a wife (or a husband)  who is proceeding with divorce is being led by her sexual hormones, lusts , and that is the number one reasons for almost all of the divorces by women as well today.. they watch too much sex on TV, women's magazines, advertisements and they think they should have the same life.. sex does not make one happy.. Jesus alone does. (Psa 51:10-12 KJV) "Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me. {11} Cast me not away from thy presence; and take not thy holy spirit from me. {12} Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation; and uphold me with thy free spirit."
All the cases where I was able to reconcile the partners, they had to admit, deal with the truths... in other words they had to repent, of these sins, admit how sinful they themselves were, are. .. all of them.. and the still lazy people who do now really not stay in God's word, cause they are spoiled rotten and undisciplined now too  God in irony allows them to be divorce, to be punished..
And what has the Father or the Mother in law, Pastor  to do with it? How often do we see this now too? In  the state of Washington a police chief even shot his wife.. and recently the news media reported that Restraining order served on B.C. man hours before wife, mother-in-law slain- - MISSION, B.C. -- A man was being sought after his wife and mother-in-law were shot to death at a hospital had been served with a restraining order hours earlier for harassing his wife, RCMP said..  This same person later shot and killed himself when the police had found him.   These deaths are tragic and likely could have been prevented here and elsewhere too now ..if they had been adequately dealt with next not by easy divorce, restraining orders but by the decent proper pastoral counseling..  sadly outside meddlers do interfere in marriages in reality too, relatives included. I also whole heartily agree that a wife going behind her husband's back to her relatives, to her pastors, to others and not talking firstly to her husband is immoral.. is still a sin of rebellion as well and I pray she also really now, next repents of this and stops doing this as well.        "

If a pastor, counselor, husband  wants to successfully deal with this he needs also to deal and expose these three items

A women tends not to file for divorce unless

1: She already in her mind, or in reality has a sexual partner substitute..

2: She has built up or acquired a cash reserve for the lawyers, divorce court battles..

3: She has the wrong immoral support of her family, friends, associated, community to carry out this wrong adulterous divorce..

Thiose are the facts of life as Jesus told me relating to divorce..

- A women has the false immoral  support of her family, and false friends, sadly even pastors,  when she applies for divorce.. they are immoral like her and they need to be told this too..  do not hesitate to tell them the whole truth

- A women does not file for divorce unless she in her  own real mind she has a substitute sex partner planed next already too.. she will next rush to him.. even though it is mostly also a fantasy not known to others .. unrealistic expectations of life.. a key contributory cause to the sexual divorces mostly today... but you had already agreed with this I see..

- Also do tell Her the wife  that before she tries to remove the beam from her husband she needs to still first deal with the beam in her own eye.. first and she needs to let Jesus still make any of the changes in the marriage .. in his time and his way..

- A women also  does not  file for divorce unless he has at least 10- 15, 000 dollars stashed away to pay the lawyers, and she also expects to make money form the divorce.. and that still makes her an sexual and now economic prostitute.. admit it or not this is a fact.

- and the way she is now treating her husband is the sadly way she responds to God as well in realty and that too still is unacceptable.

Now I have often seen, encountered  this pattern. For example I had told one of my business partner that his wife was having an affair and was palling to divorce him.. he totally disbelieved me.. could I blame it.. it is a shocking jolt to the system. I knew it cause she had asked me out on a date that I had rightfully turned down. He was troubled by what I had said and he went home and thought about.. He decided that he would go through his wife personal affairs and discovered that she had salted away, hidden from him 15,000 dollars. He had  found a bank deposit book in one of her boots. But this man denied his wife was filing for her divorce or was having an affair. A few weeks later during a heated  quarrel with his wife, his wife blurted out, you are not the only one I have slept with, I have slept with two other guys now as well.. A few months later she field for divorce and divorce him.

The 15,000 dollars was given to her by her brother for the divorce.. .
(Prov 31:12 KJV)  She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

(Exo 20:14 KJV)  Thou shalt not commit adultery.

(Exo 20:17 KJV)  Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbour's.

(Mat 5:28 KJV)  But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.
(Ezek 33:31 KJV)  And they come unto thee as the people cometh, and they sit before thee as my people, and they hear thy words, but they will not do them: for with their mouth they show much love, but their heart goeth after their covetousness.
(Jer 18:12 KJV)  And they said, There is no hope: but we will walk after our own devices, and we will every one do the imagination of his evil heart.

(Jer 18:  KJV)   8   If that nation, against whom I have pronounced, turn from their evil, I will repent of the evil that I thought to do unto them. 9 And at what instant I shall speak concerning a nation, and concerning a kingdom, to build and to plant it; 10  If it do evil in my sight, that it obey not my voice, then I will repent of the good, wherewith I said I would benefit them. 11  ...  Thus saith the LORD; Behold, I frame evil against you, and devise a device against you: return ye now every one from his evil way, and make your ways and your doings good.
(Rom 8:28 KJV)  And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose... and that now means now your supposedly bad marriage or your past divorce now as well..
(Prov 16:25 KJV)  There is a way that seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.

(Mark 10:9 KJV)  What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.10 And in the house his disciples asked him again of the same matter.11  And he saith unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her.12 And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery. 
So all things do work out for the good  of those who love God, but the evil persons rather  fall into the pit they dug with their own hands still, next.. that includes divorce now too.. Too many times today many people even supposedly Christian persons they do  take an ostrich approach to the Bible, and their unrepentant sins.. they do wrongfully deny the Bible, History that there will be  any negative consequences too for it..
Their real lack of faith in God causes these people to wrongfully consider  alternative explanations, alternative approaches to God's ways? Sound very familiar.. does it now remind of Abraham and his wife Sarah? where Sarah  had added a human approach wrongfully to God's way, will.. to get a son !
 (Gen 16:1 KJV)  Now Sarai Abram's wife bare him no children: and she had an handmaid, an Egyptian, whose name was Hagar.2 And Sarai said unto Abram, Behold now, the LORD hath restrained me from bearing: I pray thee, go in unto my maid; it may be that I may obtain children by her. And Abram hearkened to the voice of Sarai. Sarah next  lived to regret her wrong humanistic approach as well to God's plan, will.. (Gen 16:4 KJV)  And he( Abraham)  went in unto Hagar, and she conceived: and when she saw that she had conceived, her mistress was despised in her eyes.   5  And Sarai said unto Abram, My wrong be upon thee: I have given my maid into thy bosom; and when she saw that she had conceived, I was despised in her eyes: the LORD judge between me and thee.  God next  returned Abraham to God's original will, for Abrham to have a son through his original wife as well.  (Gen  17:15 KJV)  And God said unto Abraham, As for Sarai thy wife, thou shalt not call her name Sarai, but Sarah shall her name be.16   And I will bless her, and give thee a son also of her: yea, I will bless her, and she shall be a mother of nations; kings of people shall be of her.
God is not taken by surprised by any of this he still has all things under control

(2 Pet 2:7 KJV)     And delivered just Lot, vexed with the filthy conversation of the wicked: 8  (For that righteous man dwelling among them, in seeing and hearing, vexed his righteous soul from day to day with their unlawful deeds;) 9  The Lord knoweth how to deliver the godly out of temptations, and to reserve the unjust unto the day of judgment to be punished:

(John 2:24 KJV)  But Jesus did not commit himself unto them, because he knew all men, 25  And needed not that any should testify of man: for he knew what was in man.

Sadly divorce is on the increase even among Christians wrongfully , with more women filing for divorces than men as well

Telling all the parties the truth is the first part..  you can start by sending them this.. if you really do now  want to fully help, deal with this practically.

Furthermore the People who could  approve of divorce, could also next approve of  abortion and would approve of murder next too..  -Divorced persons  they will live on the average of 8 years less too.. all of this just  for a start. The people who get divorce on the average will increase their health problems due to the related stress of a divorce, cause divorce is from hell and not from God.. we sadly  really still cannot always stop many of the  persons suffering really hard next too no matter how much we do  care for, really do love them, just like the prodigal son they too may  have to mostly learn the hard way by a divorce too  and to take the real hard, long way home too.. -and they never  experience the real fruit of the Holy Spirit of peace, gentleness.. during or after...

What really is needed again is mandatory divorce counseling before couples go ahead with divorce. 
With the measure you measure it will be measured back to you.. for (Gal 6:7 KJV)  Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.8 For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting.

This  verse still applies for all of  her false divorce supporters too.. I know of many many many selfish, unrepentant Friends, neighbours, mothers who wrecked marriages.. lives.. and did not stop doing it too. they all also still needs to really  repent,  get right with God, the wife and  the husband too..

God sees what people will be like at the end after they go through much more hell on earth.. and then may admit how bad they are and the world is.. we sadly  really still cannot stop any of the  persons suffering really hard next too no matter how much we do  care for, really do love them, just like the prodigal son they too may  have to mostly learn the hard way take the long way home too..

(Ezek 14:19  KJV)   Or if I send a pestilence into that land, and pour out my fury upon it in blood, to cut off from it man and beast: 20  Though Noah, Daniel, and Job, were in it, as I live, saith the Lord GOD, they shall deliver neither son nor daughter; they shall but deliver their own souls by their righteousness. ... 23  And they shall comfort you, when ye see their ways and their doings: and ye shall know that I have not done without cause all that I have done in it, saith the Lord GOD.

All simple too

Praying they will respond to the truth presented is another matter  .. but it  still means the truth has to be told.

Now!  No pit that you many be in, have fallen into,  is still is deep enough that God can not help you out off but still only  if you let him, not everyone does or will next too still.
Eph. 4:32 says, "And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you."
(1 Cor 4:21 KJV)  What will ye? shall I come unto you with a rod, or in love, and in the spirit of meekness?
(Gal 6:1 KJV)  Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted.
(Eph 4:2 KJV)  With all lowliness and meekness, with long-suffering, forbearing one another in love;
(Col 3:12 KJV)  Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, long-suffering;
(1 Tim 6:11 KJV)  But thou, O man of God, flee these things; and follow after righteousness, godliness, faith, love, patience, meekness.
(2 Tim 2:25 KJV)  In meekness instructing those that oppose themselves; if God peradventure will give them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth;
(Titus 3:2 KJV)  To speak evil of no man, to be no brawlers, but gentle, showing all meekness unto all men.
(James 1:21 KJV)  Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls.
(James 3:13 KJV)  Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? let him show out of a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom.
(1 Pet 3:15 KJV)  But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear:
(1 Cor 7:29 KJV)  But this I say, brethren, the time is short: it remaineth, that both they that have wives be as though they had none; 30  And they that weep, as though they wept not; and they that rejoice, as though they rejoiced not; and they that buy, as though they possessed not; 31  And they that use this world, as not abusing it: for the fashion of this world passeth away.
(1 Th 5:23 KJV)  And the very God of peace sanctify you wholly; and I pray God your whole spirit and soul and body be preserved blameless unto the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Need Help ask God for it, he will always help you if you humbly ask,  he maybe may still not help still your spouse but he will help you if you let him.
"I really have Failed - even in My Marriage! What Now? (Rom 8:28 KJV)  And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

"I Failed " some would say and other may wrongfully replied so what? showing they really don't care especially about you and your hurts, and we get hurt, angry bitter some more.

Trying by oneself to  take back control of one's life. WOW! "I have failed,  I am really hurt and upset at it", This is something I run into still too often it seems."I REALLY STILL  CAN'T MAKE THINGS TO COME BACK TO THE WAY THEY WERE BEFORE". Maybe you really are not meant to?   I find that I talk to so many in life and on the Internet that feel so guilty and lost because somewhere they have messed up. and they now do want still to have back now their old ways they had before.
Many persons with a failed marriage do  feel so guilty and lost because somewhere they have messed up. and they now do want still to have back now their old ways they had before.  Why? Persons from a troubled marriage  do often  felt they are deeply hurting because they felt still  so alone inside, and then if left alone even physically as well the weight next still becomes even more unbearable"Revenge.. A Normal selfish and common temptation when a marriage is being ended. Why? Even " two out of three professing Christians even I talk to that are facing a broken marriage are also fighting the resulting still deep depression and the satanic real urge to take their or someone else's life.  Satan the accuser of the brethren and their past life, failure, pride is hurting them and their failures continue to remind them they have failed and continue more to hurt them too, they  are still now solely concentrating on self, not God even". Their relationship has mainly been around themselves and their spouse clearly too, and they now really wrongfully had left God out of the picture almost. So know they do not know really what to do instead and suicide, and/or revenge on others is the first common,, wrong  knee jerk reaction.  They donít sit and plan to do it, it and the devil it sort of sneaks up on them. In their hearts they know initially  it's wrong, but the hurts, the mind and  head just wonít shut up. . "so they react in the flesh. Even divorce lawyers who should have really known better  themselves have been known to kill their divorcing spouse
(1 Ki 8:46 KJV)  If they sin against thee, (for there is no man that sinneth not,) and thou be angry with them, and deliver them to the enemy, so that they carry them away captives unto the land of the enemy, far or near; 47  Yet if they shall bethink themselves in the land whither they were carried captives, and repent, and make supplication unto thee in the land of them that carried them captives, saying, We have sinned, and have done perversely, we have committed wickedness; 48  And so return unto thee with all their heart, and with all their soul, in the land of their enemies, which led them away captive, and pray unto thee toward their land, which thou gavest unto their fathers, the city which thou hast chosen, and the house which I have built for thy name: 49  Then hear thou their prayer and their supplication in heaven thy dwelling place, and maintain their cause, 50  And forgive thy people that have sinned against thee, and all their transgressions wherein they have transgressed against thee, and give them compassion before them who carried them captive, that they may have compassion on them: (Heb 8:12 KJV)  For I will be merciful to their unrighteousness, and their sins and their iniquities will I remember no more.
AND SOME WRONGFULY WILL SAY Then what is the point of God, or of living if we cannot have our way?
(Mark 8:33 KJV)  But when he had turned about and looked on his disciples, he rebuked Peter, saying, Get thee behind me, Satan: for thou savourest not the things that be of God, but the things that be of men.
(Luke 4:8 KJV)  And Jesus answered and said unto him, Get thee behind me, Satan: for it is written, Thou shalt worship the Lord thy God, and him only shalt thou serve.
(Mat 16:23 KJV)  But he turned, and said unto Peter, Get thee behind me, Satan: thou art an offence unto me: for thou savourest not the things that be of God, but those that be of men.
That is part of the real main problem we have been living our own selfish ways and the devils. those of other men and women,  and not God's way, will  firstly.
(Prov 14:12 KJV)  There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.
(Isa 66:3 KJV)  He that killeth an ox is as if he slew a man; he that sacrificeth a lamb, as if he cut off a dog's neck; he that offereth an oblation, as if he offered swine's blood; he that burneth incense, as if he blessed an idol. Yea, they have chosen their own ways, and their soul delighteth in their abominations. 4 I also will choose their delusions, and will bring their fears upon them; because when I called, none did answer; when I spake, they did not hear: but they did evil before mine eyes, and chose that in which I delighted not. 5 Hear the word of the LORD, ye that tremble at his word; Your brethren that hated you, that cast you out for my name's sake, said, Let the LORD be glorified: but he shall appear to your joy, and they shall be ashamed. 6  A voice of noise from the city, a voice from the temple, a voice of the LORD that rendereth recompense to his enemies.7 Before she travailed, she brought forth; before her pain came, she was delivered of a man child.

(Isa 43:19 KJV)  Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert.
(Psa 37:25 KJV)  I have been young, and now am old; yet have I not seen the righteous forsaken, nor his seed begging bread.
(Jer 51:5 KJV)  For Israel hath not been forsaken, nor Judah of his God, of the LORD of hosts; though their land was filled with sin against the Holy One of Israel.
God will do a new thing, he will change you, your OWN heart, your own  soul if you let him firstly.

God will now next personally really help you, forgive you when you fail but he will not always still necessarily restore your old marriage, your old job, or what you lost, your money, house and your health included. Sometimes you have to go on.. on with God that is.
 (Phil 3:13 KJV)  Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,
(Phil 3:14 KJV)  I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.
(Phil 3:15 KJV)  Let us therefore, as many as be perfect, be thus minded: and if in any thing ye be otherwise minded, God shall reveal even this unto you.
Many people set too high standards for themselves that most of us will fail and we next will personally greatly be disillusioned, depressed. We failed to understand what has let to our depression and failures as well.. Ambition and lust Goals not set by God but by ourselves and other people.  Some persons wrongfully even fail to set any decent standards and they too will suffer for it next.

Lets look next at this kind of  resulting failure depression a moment, many persons do not understand it at all, they just canít understand how anyone would ever consider next suicide, violence, revenge as a valid way of solving their problems.

Most people that reach this place are still real  people and if you see them on the surface you really wonít even know it. They sit in church ever week, they smile, they joke, they go to their jobs and perform well. They mostly arenít out drinking or doing illegal drugs, they have kids and homes, and a broken heart, a marriage that has already failed or about too. They donít sit and plan to do it, it and the devil it sort of sneaks up on them. In their hearts they know initially  it's wrong, but the mind and  head just wonít shut up.

At first the persons from a troubled marriage felt they are deeply hurting because they felt still  so alone inside, and then if left alone even physically as well the weight next still becomes even more unbearable. So they do try to take the hint from books, tapes, bad friends, some even learn to talk I mean really talk to each other, make time to listen, to hold, to show love and caring and yet they cannot resolve the problem for the problem is also the other persons often. They can say I care, I love you, but if you or they canít talk, if you or they don't, canít listen to each other, if you are married and canít still feel the pain in your heart for your spouse you are both in for really big troubles. And you next should not leave them alone, for long periods of time, you are clearly asking for a quicker failed marriage. If the spouse has to  relocate due to what ever reason go with them. If your husband has to drive over the road, and then you go with him, learn to drive a truck too. If you love your wife and Christ maybe you should consider a job in a factory, or selling shoes before you leave your spouse behind because next the real the pain without them next will almost kill you still too.. People too often and bad pastors, bad counselors too try to take the supposedly easy way, the way out of the marriage and it turns out to be the long wrong hard way for them in reality personally still. Why
(Mal 2:16 KJV)  For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away: for one covereth violence with his garment, saith the LORD of hosts: therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously.
(Mal 2:17 KJV)  Ye have wearied the LORD with your words. Yet ye say, Wherein have we wearied him? When ye say, Every one that doeth evil is good in the sight of the LORD, and he delighteth in them; or, Where is the God of judgment?
(Deu 12:8 KJV)  Ye shall not do after all the things that we do here this day, every man whatsoever is right in his own eyes.
Facing positively more of the negatives.. The resulting marital, divorce depression slips in, the hours of watching TV, soon you donít even know what was on, you donít hear the words, then you find you donít want to go to the store by yourself, you donít want to eat, cause nothing is worse then eating alone. Who really enjoys sitting in a restaurant with no one across from you? You next even find no joy in a movie or going any place so you sit alone. You find yourself reaching out to just talk to anyone, thus chat rooms, and ICQ, and still all of this is a sure way to end up getting hurt more, and more but why? Firstly you are trying to fill in the God shaped vacuum in your own life with a replacement for God himself likely still.
(Jer 2:13 KJV)  For my people have committed two evils; they have forsaken me the fountain of living waters, and hewed them out cisterns, broken cisterns, that can hold no water. (Jer 4:22 KJV)  For my people is foolish, they have not known me; they are sottish children, and they have none understanding: they are wise to do evil, but to do good they have no knowledge. (Jer 4:23 KJV)  I beheld the earth, and, lo, it was without form, and void; and the heavens, and they had no light.
Really do now Stop taking worldly advice of Looking to be loved, looking for love in the wrong places and this still is what most people do wrongfully next too.
(Jer 29:32 KJV)  Therefore thus saith the LORD; Behold, I will punish Shemaiah the Nehelamite, and his seed: he shall not have a man to dwell among this people; neither shall he behold the good that I will do for my people, saith the LORD; because he hath taught rebellion against the LORD.
Stop now looking for,  to  the first substitutionary spouse, person that seems to care about you. You are so hungry to want to be loved and feel needed, trouble is most are dogs in worse places and shape then you are. Many people do lie to you and give you bad advice, for they still mostly seek only what you can do for them personally physically, while there are some wonderful people even on the net, but I assure you most are not. Not even in churches.  Why be surprised, they are the same people you see in the grocery store and wouldnít even consider to carry your bags to the car for you. Yet on the net you may become invisible and so are they, you let go a side of you, you never show when eyes are upon you. You may unload your heart, to people on the net, at work, at churches, elsewhere and then you find out the truth too late, they really don't care to help you, they only pretended they did, and you are even more crushed. You many next find some of the words of love and all the sweet messages,even  the small gifts exchanged, even the casual meeting were all designed maybe to solve  a need of being alone or wanting sex and not so much really them personally still caring for you, or really wanting you mow too and you will be more disappointed, more depressed.
(Mat 6:31 KJV)  Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed? 32  (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. 33  But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. 34  Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.
You still may seek to have your friendship need to be fulfilled. (Prov 18:24 KJV)  A man that hath friends must show himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.
You still may seek to have your friendship need to be fulfilled.  But the person you are talking is seeking something else totally differently still.  It is a  fact is that you will end up being hurt at least three to five times next even by people you think love you even on the net before you may even  find one that is sincere. Well that certainly doesnít means that people, even churches, even  the net is not a way to find someone again next  in your life. Just face it knowing they are on the net are really still unresolved troubled persons also looking for the same reasons you are. They are hiding in a way from the world; this is a easy way to cover something up. You say how can I be so sure? The real undeniable experience and the words of so many that have counseled and that  have been there. The critical point here also is that is any relationship that even has to start with deceit or a lie is one bound for failure even friendship. Most people lie every 3 to 5 minutes still.  I met a person that says they  just want a friend, sends me a picture, weeks later after in fact we found we could be friends, and he next says said gee Iím sorry I didnít send you my real picture. I asked why? Because I am only 5 feet tall and weigh 260 pounds. Why am I saying all this, because it leads to deep sense of lost inside, you end up feeling you can trust no one at all. No one really cared about the real you.

So another important  lesson : Be honest 100% from the beginning, while you do also use appropriate declare too,  and accept nothing less than full honesty from all those you do  talk to. Donít add to the pain, the frustration and fear of the truth coming out but don't accept the liars still too  If you are fat, bald, bad eyes, no leg, been divorced ten times, gone to jail, what ever donít fully hide it. If a person is worth being a friend to, and if they are worth falling in love with you must always still be open and honest.  Any Relationships built on dishonesty, false pretenses cannot work next for the good of both parties. Likely this was why the first relationship you had with your sponsor, pastor, spouse, relative had  failed you, they had leaned how to deceive, lied to you.
Now too often still  you find yourself afraid to even trust those that call themselves Christians for they too have and do  let you down. Again why be surprised? These are the same type of people that sit in the church ever Sunday, sing there songs, preach, and smile at you and shake your hand hoping you sit in the back away from them. The same ones that see you in a short dress and wrongfully  think I wonder how she is in bed, while they shake your hand and smile and say oh God is so good, and its so good to see you. They hope you go to the choir and sit on the front bench and they too do  forget to put your knees together when you sit down. They are the same women that may flirt with you with their eyes and hold your hand to long, the ones that you know and so does anyone else paying attention is also in trouble at home with her hubby. They never talk, never are together and body language says for all to hear, I wish he would sit some place besides by me. O.K. Iím being blunt and honest, let me go ahead, if Iím going to be in trouble let me go all the way. There really is nothing good in most men and women in reality.. beware of men.
(Mat 7:15 KJV)  Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. 16  Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles? 17  Even so every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit. 18  A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit. 19  Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire. 20  Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them. 21  Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven. 22  Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works? 23  And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity. 24  Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock: 25  And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock.
Itís the same too often bad preacher that while heís praying for you, he really likes laying on of hands, he hopes you will fall out in a way that gives a good view, he wants to hug and you can feel he pulls you a little closer then he should. Heís the guy that canít take his eyes off you while he preaches, and always seems to find a way to talk to you, oh asking such innocent questions. he has wrong, false motives for caring about you too.

 My advice is learning to read the signs in person and that will help you to read them on the net too. Its no wonder you feel so alone and lost and with out hope, 80% of the Christians should be called Satan's followers still, for they are not truly of God. Iím sorry I too have spent all my life in church and around preachers, I have learned more dirty and slanted jokes from them then on any job. I have them make more comment bout the ladies in a suggestive way then the guys at work, at least the ones at work do it in the open, and you know what they are.
Mat 7:15 Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves.
Let me say preachers are human, just like you are, so they mess up. The problem isnít messing up itís the undeniable and unrepented of hypocrisies thatís still their problem.
1 Pet 1:25 But the word of the Lord endureth forever. And this is the word which by the gospel is preached unto you.
1 Pet 2:1 Wherefore laying aside all malice, and all guile, and hypocrisies, and envies, and all evil speakings,
All this adds to a greater feeling of lost hope, you pray and God donít hear you? Have you been there, I have and what do you do then?
Mat 5:44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;
Mat 5:45 That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.
Mat 6:5 And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.
Mat 6:6 But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly.
Mat 6:7 But when ye pray, use not vain repetitions, as the heathen do: for they think that they shall be heard for their much speaking.
Mat 6:8 Be not ye therefore like unto them: for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him.
Mat 6:9 After this manner therefore pray ye: Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name.
Mat 6:10 Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven.
Mat 6:11 Give us this day our daily bread.
Mat 6:12 And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.
Mat 6:13 And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil: For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, forever. Amen.
Mat 6:14 For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you:
Mat 6:15 But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.
Mat 6:16 Moreover when ye fast, be not, as the hypocrites, of a sad countenance: for they disfigure their faces, that they may appear unto men to fast. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.
Mat 6:17 But thou, when thou fastest, anoint thine head, and wash thy face;
Mat 6:18 That thou appear not unto men to fast, but unto thy Father which is in secret: and thy Father, which seeth in secret, shall reward thee openly.
This next verse is one we should be doing before we get in trouble not wait till we are all ready. Itís a part of the preventive medicine.
Mat 26:41 Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.
Mark 11:24 Therefore I say unto you, What things soever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them.
Mark 11:25 And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.
Mark 11:26 But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses.
O.K. here is a big key as to why you still canít be heard. You are hurting, your husband, wife, friend, lover, or pastor, church member, son or daughter have all hurt you. You canít receive anything from God till you forgive yourself and them too, and how do you know you have really forgiven them?  Forgiving them means letting God now himself deal appropriately with them as he wants and not you. After all that is his job still and not yours.
(Rom 14:4 KJV)  Who art thou that judgest another man's servant? to his own master he standeth or falleth. Yea, he shall be holden up: for God is able to make him stand.
(Isa 63:4 KJV)  For the day of vengeance is in mine heart, and the year of my redeemed is come.
(Rom 12:19 KJV)  Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.
Thus by forgiving them and when the bitterness is gone, when the anger is gone, in its place you feel rather next really sorry for them and you will even pray for them and ask then also to repent.
I know someone that went to a motel to meet a preacher, one that said he was in love with her. And being her marriage was over, and so was his, this was supposed to be new beginning of life a spiritual marriage between to soul mates till the legal ones took place. Oh he was so hot to trot he paid for the rooms, they had talked on the phone and over the net and it was true love and happiness, till he kissed her and saw she weighed 200 lbs. He left her there, sneak away, now heís Dr. Tim ____________ and is still leading other ladies to the motel room. Thank God this lady was a little heavy and didnít go to bed with him for it wasnít a marriage of souls he wanted, he wanted a marriage of meeting the supposed problem in his pants. If it were of souls would size have mattered, no. The real shame is he might be your pastor right now, it destroyed her for long time. One day he too may or will see he has failed his wife, and his church, and most of all God.

So donít hold on to him or it but let God handle him or her. You seek God and let God show you what to do.  The thing is though when this happens something in you snaps, you still may feel so lost so alone, you may take pornography instead, bury yourself in food, into trying to do more good works to get favour with others, or drinking more alcohol, taking bad drugs, or you grab a bottle of pills you just take em. You cut your wrists, you grab that old gun off the shelve, I should be dead today and many of you, but for some reason God saved us. The reason is you still have a work to do for him and for yourself  and he still wants you to be  happy. Firstly
Mark 13:33 Take ye heed, watch and pray: for ye know not when the time is.
Mark 13:34 For the Son of man is as a man taking a far journey, who left his house, and gave authority to his servants, and to every man his work, and commanded the porter to watch.
Mark 13:35 Watch ye therefore: for ye know not when the master of the house cometh, at even, or at midnight, or at the cock crowing, or in the morning:
Mark 13:36 Lest coming suddenly he find you sleeping.
Mark 13:37 And what I say unto you I say unto all, Watch.
(Acts 9:31 KJV)  Then had the churches rest throughout all Judaea and Galilee and Samaria, and were edified; and walking in the fear of the Lord, and in the comfort of the Holy Ghost, were multiplied.
(2 Cor 1:4 KJV)  Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God. 5  For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also aboundeth by Christ. 6  And whether we be afflicted, it is for your consolation and salvation, which is effectual in the enduring of the same sufferings which we also suffer: or whether we be comforted, it is for your consolation and salvation. 7  And our hope of you is stedfast, knowing, that as ye are partakers of the sufferings, so shall ye be also of the consolation. 8  For we would not, brethren, have you ignorant of our trouble which came to us in Asia, that we were pressed out of measure, above strength, insomuch that we despaired even of life: 9  But we had the sentence of death in ourselves, that we should not trust in ourselves, but in God which raiseth the dead: 10  Who delivered us from so great a death, and doth deliver: in whom we trust that he will yet deliver us;
OK do you really want to die in that really unspirtual  condition now as well, no. you know you donít. Here it is folks, you canít help it, and the body reacts as if on its own. Someone needs you, just like you had needed someone. Be also there for them, and trust God. be a good friend and not a bad one for them too.
Luke 10:2 Therefore said he unto them, The harvest truly is great, but the labourers are few: pray ye therefore the Lord of the harvest, that he would send forth labourers into his harvest.3  Go your ways: behold, I send you forth as lambs among wolves.
Now you have your mission in life. But I messed up my marriage is gone, my wife is gone, my husband is gone, Iím not happy. SO?
Mat 10:28 And fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul: but rather fear him which is able to destroy both soul and body in hell.
If you think your life is hell now, my dear friend you have no ideal how bad it is to lose your soul. Ok you messed up, you failed, some of those Christians (satians) will condemn you and not except you anymore. Gee the church may not let you preach anymore. LOL (laughing out loud) Like who called you to preach, who ordained you,
Gal 1:10 For do I now persuade men, or God? or do I seek to please men? for if I yet pleased men, I should not be the servant of Christ.
Gal 1:11 But I certify you, brethren, that the gospel which was preached of me is not after man.
Gal 1:12 For I neither received it of man, neither was I taught it, but by the revelation of Jesus Christ.
So why are you so worried bout those that havenít learned to forgive or understand, those that think they stand so mighty and right, the only ones saved.
Mat 10:17 But beware of men: for they will deliver you up to the councils, and they will scourge you in their synagogues;
Mat 10:18 And ye shall be brought before governors and kings for my sake, for a testimony against them and the Gentiles.
Mat 10:19 But when they deliver you up, take no thought how or what ye shall speak: for it shall be given you in that same hour what ye shall speak.
Mat 10:20 For it is not ye that speak, but the Spirit of your Father which speaketh in you.
Mat 10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
Mat 10:22 And ye shall be hated of all men for my name's sake: but he that endureth to the end shall be saved.
Mat 10:23 But when they persecute you in this city, flee ye into another: for verily I say unto you, Ye shall not have gone over the cities of Israel, till the Son of man be come.
Mat 10:24 The disciple is not above his master, nor the servant above his lord.
Mat 10:25 It is enough for the disciple that he be as his master, and the servant as his lord. If they have called the master of the house Beelzebub, how much more shall they call them of his household?
Mat 10:26 Fear them not therefore: for there is nothing covered, that shall not be revealed; and hid, that shall not be known.
Mat 16:6 Then Jesus said unto them, Take heed and beware of the leaven of the Pharisees and of the Sadducees.
Mat 16:12 Then understood they how that he bade them not beware of the leaven of bread, but of the doctrine of the Pharisees and of the Sadducees.
Mark 12:38 And he said unto them in his doctrine, Beware of the scribes, which love to go in long clothing, and love salutations in the marketplaces,
Mark 12:39 And the chief seats in the synagogues, and the uppermost rooms at feasts:
Mark 12:40 Which devour widows' houses, and for a pretence make long prayers: these shall receive greater damnation.
"Ok admit it was the way I once was too, I thought the rulebooks were the way to go, that I had the answers was always right. And donít this sound a lot like your pastor? He canít wait to lay hands on everyone, he canít wait to put on his robe and sit in his big chair on the stage, he brags bout the people he knows, couldnít say a real prayer cause he donít know how to pray. Ok so you donít like it the way I see it Iím sorry. I have been almost ever kind of church in America and those verses hit home with most pastors and preachers. In case I miss something look at this one, how many times do you hear bout money in the church? Look in the parking lot, what kind of car is your preacher driving while you canít afford a good heap. What kind of suit does he have on, ever notice how many AG preachers that have big diamond rings?"
Luke 12:15 And he said unto them, Take heed, and beware of covetousness: for a manís life consisteth not in the abundance of the things which he possesseth.
Word of advice to church members a preacher that also handles the church money your asking for trouble. Not because he means to be a theft, but why would you want your husband or wife to live with the opposite sex and them naked. You donít think something would evenly happen that shouldnít, wrong.
Phil 3:2 Beware of dogs, beware of evil workers, beware of the concision.
Col 2:8 Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men,
after the rudiments of the world, and not after Christ.
Col 2:9 For in him dwelleth all the fulness of the Godhead bodily.
Col 2:10 And ye are complete in him, which is the head of all principality and power:
Luke 6:37 Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven:
Luke 6:38 Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again.
John 3:17 For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved.
John 3:18 He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.
God is not condemning you for messing up you are condemning yourself. Stop it. Who cares if others donít know what God is telling you. You know!
John 8:10 When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?
John 8:11 She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.
John 8:12 Then spake Jesus again unto them, saying, I am the light of the world: he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life.
Rom 8:8 So then they that are in the flesh cannot please God.
Mat 12:41 The men of Nineveh shall rise in judgment with this generation, and shall condemn it: because they repented at the preaching of Jonas; and, behold, a greater than Jonas is here.
Mat 12:42 The queen of the south shall rise up in the judgment with this generation, and shall condemn it: for she came from the uttermost parts of the earth to hear the wisdom of Solomon; and, behold, a greater than Solomon is here.
Look Christ is out leader our savior, he loves you, he is whom you serve, and he is not here to condemn you. He is not here to say your life is over cause your marriage failed. You canít undo what you did or your spouse did but you can go on and serve him.
1 John 3:20 For if our heart condemn us, God is greater than our heart, and knoweth all things.
1 John 3:21 Beloved, if our heart condemn us not, then have we confidence toward God.
1 John 3:22 And whatsoever we ask, we receive of him, because we keep his commandments, and do those things that are pleasing in his sight.
1 John 3:23 And this is his commandment, That we should believe on the name of his Son Jesus Christ, and love one another, as he gave us commandment.
1 John 3:24 And he that keepeth his commandments dwelleth in him, and he in him. And hereby we know that he abideth in us, by the Spirit which he hath given us.
1 John 4:1 Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world.
1 John 4:2 Hereby know ye the Spirit of God: Every spirit that confesseth that Jesus Christ is come in the flesh is of God:
1 John 4:3 And every spirit that confesseth not that Jesus Christ is come in the flesh is not of God: and this is that spirit of antichrist, whereof ye have heard that it should come; and even now already is it in the world.
1 John 4:4 Ye are of God, little children, and have overcome them: because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world.
So where do we go next and how do we win? How can I get back right with God? You can not undo the wrongs you done. You can say youíre sorry, you can pay restitution, you can still not undo what is done, but you can go forward. You can learn from it and be better for the lessons you have learned.